WHY AM I YELLING!!!!

ok - i'll stop for a moment. mostly i am yelling ( and yes, this is me whispering - i know... extremes right? ) because i finished my first semester back to school - i still don't have my grades which is making me a bit uneasy but they will be here soon enough. i am signed up for classes in the fall so i have the summer to focus... on .. just ... AAAAHHHHH... work ---- which... i am not happy with for many reasons.. and i am totally torn about my decision to be an art teacher, even though i know... that what i do not is not really for me, it just pays the bills. i want to be creating....all sorts of thoughts have been flooding my mind since my last final was over. i definitely enjoy teaching art... i feel a natural connection to it but.... i also feel like... it may not be challenging enough in the long run.. but you can't see that far.. have to have your 5 year.. then 10 year out plans i guess... be business minded about it... plus may is crazy... to teenagers having birthdays, one getting his driver's licence and a car... the other wants to get a job like big bro .. she is seeing the financial fruits of his labor.. and she wants it too... hubby and i want to get bikes.. and i want to lose like .. 50 lbs... wow ! .... ok.. maybe this has helped me to stop yelling for now.. but i truly feel the need to run up and down the street.. screamming at the top of my lungs... not for attention.. i just need to let it all out....... or drink heavily..... PS.. HOPE YOU LIKE THE NEW LOOK.. IT WILL BE GETTING MORE INTERESTING .. PROMISE!