educational psych, carpal pain and getting organized

January has been a busy month with going back to school and getting back into the swing of things at work.

My only problem with work in my hand/arm/ shoulder and neck are killing me, but my husband keeps me focused on the healing aspects of the pain. Today it is better. I have been using my left hand all week long at work with the mouse and it has been very frustrating even though I use it that way at home on the weekends. Work is high pressure though and I have found that all the knowledge is somehow locked in my right hand or I guess my left brain. My husband is encouraging me to stick with using my left and assures me that using my right brain more at work will give me a new perspective. Sounds good.

The class I am taking is Educational Psych. It's interesting and I am looking forward to my field hours in February. The idea of teaching art is really exciting to me. I can't wait, even though I have too. I have all sorts of ideas to share and see how students respond.

As far as getting organized. We are doing some of that at home and I am working to become better organized at work as well. I just know I can be more efficient.

I want to do a new banner for Valentine's Day but not sure if I will have the time. We will see - signing off - Crabby Monkey - OUT! ;)

NEW YEAR, NEW PERSPECTIVE

Well, I think that says it all for now! :)

Christmas spirit, dead computers and growing older

I am feeling more in the Christmas spirit since yesterday. Last week at work was exhausting. Working in a retail business setting really can kill your Christmas spirit (I can't say I was a big fan of Christmas before but yikes, now it's even harder.) But luckily my husband and I drove around a bit last night talking and looking at all the decorated homes. It does warm the heart, make you feel like a kid again (I guess that is why we drove around and that is what motivates adults to decorate their homes for the holidays) and realize that really we are all still children.

Also this idea of Christmas brings up thoughts of attachment. Attachment to objects, memories, ideas, it can be anything. A few months back life was particularly difficult for several reasons but the straw that broke the camels back for me was that the laptop computer that I had been using for several years with all sorts of ideas, memories, photos, etc. (and there are still things coming up that I realize now are on that computer) that I will never see again. Since I have my own live- in computer expert, this is a fact. The mother board just died one day. He tried to revive it, but could not. We hadn't done a back up in a while, due to busy life and extremely stressful situations that total zapped us. Let's just say, I was devastated (still feel twinges of it when I think about it). It was like a person died. I was immediately hurled back to when my mother died. Needless to say I didn't handle this computer dying thing very well. Also my husband was not prepared for the reaction since we did have another couple of computers in the house. But it wasn't about having a computer to use, it was about what that computer represented, ideas, thoughts, dreams...a record of life during a certain time frame.

So, attachment. I am finding it harder and harder to let go as I get older (turned 40 this year). So many things have happened over the years relating to death, letting go, moving on, lost dreams, dashed hopes. Attachment really can devastate you, cause you to grow older, suck the life out of you. It's not just about things or ideas, or memories, etc. It can be about relationships, personal issues, even money. You have to find a balance.

I want 2009 to be about finding my balance. I know I need to take time for myself. Time for my art, time for my soul. I want that to be a focus for me this year. My husband and I having given alot of ourselves and feel like now that we have to focus on ourselves more.

Ok I have rambled enough for this morning.

Christmas Wish For Chris With Love from Me!

Well Christmas and New Years is approaching rapidly. Ever since Thanksgiving stress and tensions have been high. With going back to school in a month, work (which is zapping the little bit of Christmas spirit I had), family illnesses this week, and family pressures (past, present and future) - I have been finding it hard to maintain any level of civility and unfortunatly my family, especially my husband has bore the brunt of it. For this I am deeply *SORRY*!

My Christmas wish is for my husband. I pray and hope with all my heart for 2009 to be a year of happiness, health and love for him. He deserves it.

For years he has been struggling and I have been not helped with my own fears, worries and emotional baggage, which has worn him down even more.

That is my Christmas Wish.

GIVING THANKS!

-Healthy, Happy kids.
-Being a family.
-Cool breezes on sunny, clear days.
-Rainy cold wintery weather.
-Snuggling with my sweety.
-New bare Christmas tree with endless possiblites.
-Sweaters.
-Weekend naps.
-Home where there are lots of hugs, laughter, cuddling and safety to be oneself.

Amen.

CREATING A MOVEMENT - undefined.

I want to start my own movement. A movement toward creative loving and living. I don't really know what that means completely, yet. I have spent much time, YEARS, thinking about it.

I see a lot of people writing about similar things in books, on blogs, magazines, as well as, talking about it in movies and on tv, but I don't see it in my little corner of the world. Maybe it's where I live. The people here. Maybe it's ME! I do have a pretty busy and secluded life. Which I like, thank you VERY MUCH!

I guess it's not just me who wants to start this movement. It's my husband and children too. We see things differently. Even when we think we have come across a similar soul it doesn't seem to click for long. I guess they are like us. They want to start their own movement, too. So, we keep moving, thinking, creating, adjusting to spread the word.

Each one of us in my family has their way of spreading the word. Through music, teaching, art, words, creating, talking, laughing, living.

I want to salute you, my fellow movement makers, but we have our own movement to spread.

God speed to us all!

More change......

Leaves are finally changing, weather is getting cold, preparing for classes to start in January (I'm going back to college, second Bachelor's degree), settling in for a snuggly winter.

Swimming has started for my daughter and my son has wrapped up marching band with high school football ending. My husband and I are enjoying retreating more from social gatherings and just enjoying spending time together.

We started down sizing the living room today to make some room for Christmas. We are not planning on going over board at all this year. Kids are going to their dad's so we are going to spend the day alone. (First time! for Christmas) We feel like we have to do things more just the two of us with my son only 1.5 yrs from leaving for college and my daugher only 3.5 yrs away.

All in all things are good.